Now the Tank has spent some considerable time in Scotland and found the quality chasm in its restaurants almost as unfathomable as the nation's long-standing tolerance of bumbling grandpa-clone Bruce Forsyth.
For every chunky Scottish salmon, there's a deep fried pie. For every smooth island whisky, there's a double vodka and Irn Bru. It's almost as if the Scots are embarrassed by the gustatory riches bestowed upon them and have to compensate with unhealthy diets, batter addiction, and concocting stories of dinosaurs living in lakes to fool naïve tourists.
Still, with their stretching renewable energy and emissions goals, if there's one thing our cousins in the north have got right, it's the low carbon agenda. Oh, and seafood.
And now - finally - the twain shall meet, in a pleasing conjunction that also draws together what could have otherwise proved a rather wayward opening few paragraphs [No change there then - Ed].
Yes, Loch Fyne Oyster Bar in Cairndow, Argyll, has followed the fine example set by Little Chef and installed its first electric car charging point a mere 55 miles from Glasgow.
At long last EV drivers can experience the beauty of Scotland's west coast, not to mention the rare breeds centre in Oban, which the Tank is reliable informed is THE place to be should you find yourself in, er, Oban. Or was, until it closed in 2007.
But, anyway, don't take our word for it, here's Adrian Loening, an electric car owner from Edinburgh.
"This is great!" he enthused, without actually specifying what 'this' is. "I travelled up to Argyll in my Nissan Leaf electric car and Loch Fyne Oysters were kind enough to provide charging. With the addition of this permanent facility this journey becomes a practical reality. I shall certainly be visiting again!"
So that's nice. Although the Tank is amazed that Loch Fyne managed to get through an entire press release without mentioning something along the lines of "Finally, the world really is a Scottish EV driver's oyster". Clearly, it's not a temptation the Tank could resist.
All the green business news from around the world this week
Civil society, researchers, and business leaders argue that multi-million pound transport industry bailouts must come with climate-friendly conditions attached
Food redistribution charities urged to apply for funding to help prevent 14,000 tonnes of surplus food going to waste amid Covid-19 disruption
Green investor Earthworm ups its support for London food technology firm as it eyes significant growth for urban and indoor farming