The Sceptic Tank is delighted to learn that global warming isn't happening and is preparing to lead the worldwide celebrations.
You can hardly imagine the sense of relief when we heard humanity was not hurtling towards the precipice, and learnt that the world's scientific community and basic laws of physics were wrong.
You may find this hard to believe if you are either a) capable of rational thought, or b) reading this in those parts of the world currently experiencing above average temperatures. But it is true and we have proof – it is snowing in London.
That's right, it really is snowing in London and ergo the world can not be warming.
We now look forward to a New Year that will see the rolling back of all those costly climate change policies and the imminent release by climate sceptics of their explanation for receding Arctic Sea ice, disappearing glaciers, accelerating rates of desertification, and increased incidence of extreme weather events, as well as their plans for tackling peak oil, energy insecurity, ocean acidification, food shortages, air pollution, and the catastrophic degradation of the ecosystems we rely on.
It should be a great 2011.
'From zero carbon heat laggard to leader': Green groups urge government to back heat pumps in recovery plans
Greenpeace, Friends of the Earth, CPRE and Possible propose 'cash for clunkers' scheme, and urge government to prioritise heat pumps over hydrogen in its green heating plans
Poll: Energy efficiency, renewables, and nature restoration are 'people's priorities' for Covid-19 package
Survey commissioned by Conservative Environment Network reveals overwhelming majority of British public want next week's recovery package to back measures that tackle pollution and climate change
Plus all the top green business news from around the world this week